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Nymphetamine2791:
Lol, ouch
Hanover Fist:
The heaviest element known was recently discovered by Boeing physicists. Tentatively named Administratium, it has no protons or electrons and thus has an atomic number of 0. However, it does have 1 neutron, 125 assistant neutrons, 75 vice neutrons and 111 assistant vice neutrons. This gives it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by a force that involves the continuous exchange of energy-like bodies called morons.
Since it has no electrons, Administratium is inert. However, it can be detected, as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. According to the discoverers, a minute amount of Administratium caused one reaction to take more than four months to complete, when it would normally have occurred overnight. Administratium has a normal half-life of approximately three years, at which time it does not decay but instead undergoes a reorganization in which the assistant neutrons, vice neutrons and assistant vice neutrons exchange places. Studies have shown that the atomic mass oddly increases after each reorganization. Administratium seems to occur naturally in the atmosphere. It tends to concentrate in certain geographic locations such as California, Massachusetts, Texas, and the District of Columbia. Other countries have large natural deposits also.
Scientists point out that Administratium is known to be toxic in any concentration and can easily destroy any productive reaction. Attempts are being made to determine how Administratium can be controlled.
Irie Naoki:
Here's a joke....
SOPA
Hanover Fist:
THE PLAN
In the beginning was The Plan
And then came the Assumptions,
And the Assumptions were without form
And The Plan was completely without substance in the void.
And darkness fell across the face of the Workers.
And they spoke amongst themselves, saying
“It is a Crock of Shit, and IT STINKETH!”
And the Workers went unto their Supervisors and sayeth:
“It is a Container of Fecal Coliforms, and it is Very Strong such that None can Abide It.”
And the Supervisors went unto the Managers and sayeth:
“It is a Vessel of Fertilizer, and None can Abide It’s Strength.”
And the Managers spoke amongst themselves and sayeth:
“It contains that which Aids Plant Growth, and is Very Strong.”
And the Managers went unto the Owners, and sayeth to them:
“It Promotes Growth and is Very Powerful.”
And the Owners went unto the rest of the Board, and sayeth unto them:
“This new Plan will Actively Promote the Growth and efficiency of this Company,
and Certain Areas in Particular.”
And the Board looked upon the Plan and saw that It was Good.
And the Plan became Policy.
And this is how Shit Happens.
Nymphetamine2791:
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